I love tea at all times of day. It’s a wonderful start to the morning, but it’s also great after meals or in the middle of a lazy and thoughtful afternoon. And later in the evening it’s just lovely to have a cup of the herbal stuff.
Tea is indisputably the king of hot beverages. It’s more refined, more varied, more international, and—goddamnit—just more intellectual than coffee. Drinking tea is like drinking a flower—sometimes literally so.
I’m on this subject because I just arrived in San Jose for another work trip, and traveling in these United States is always just one tea disappointment after another. I really should get in the habit of leaving home without any expectation of having a single decent cup of it while I’m away. The trouble is simply that no one in this country gives any thought to the tea they serve. They’ll tell you all about their organic fair-trade shade-grown artisan-roasted hand-blended blah blah blah horseshit coffee, but when it comes to tea they’ll give you at best a blank stare.
I had to take the 5:00 am flight out of Bellingham this morning (means getting up at 2:45), so by the time I got to Seatac at about 5:30 I was desperate for a piping hot serving of Earl Grey. I stopped by one of the coffee places in the food court. The girl behind the counter grabbed what looked like a decent bag of tea (as far as bagged tea goes), but then she proceeded to fill the cup with hot water first and then dunk the bag into it. Goddamnit, you stupid girl, you just violated the first principle of tea brewing! Always pour the water over the leaves. That’s the only way to get them to stay properly submerged and brew a full-bodied cup. There are countries where you get caned for doing what she did.
I took what she gave me anyway, because I was desperate, but it was seriously underwhelming. It only resembled tea, really. Brewing it that way is sort of like throwing a steak into a cold pan and turning on the heat afterward. You end up with something, but it’s not nearly what it’s supposed to be.
I knew better than to try ordering tea on my flight to San Jose (Who the hell knows what Alaska Airlines would give you?), so I was looking forward to having a proper cup when I checked into my hotel room (I’ve got a little bit of down time before I start working.). I always get put in Marriotts for my work trips, and I’m accustomed to them having a poor selection of tea. They just have this little envelope thingy with “Twinings: Your Passport to the Finest English Teas” on the front and two bags of tea inside: one Earl Grey and one decaffeinated English Breakfast (the latter of which doesn’t even count).
So as soon as I got into my room an hour and a half ago, I opened up the envelope and found that the Earl Grey had been taken by a previous guest and not replaced by the maid! There was only the undrinkable decaf! Had she not noticed this and thought that someone just might want to have a cup of fucking Early Grey? What a letdown. Meanwhile there are three (!) packets of coffee, to satisfy the rabble.
So here I am drinking coffee like an ordinary American schlub. It’s better than nothing, I guess, but it makes me long to move to a culture where tea is given the respect and veneration it deserves.
"They’ll tell you all about their organic fair-trade shade-grown artisan-roasted hand-blended blah blah blah horseshit coffee"-Preach brother! Brilliant!
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